Before Halloween, it’s time for parents, grandparents, and babysitters to get scared.

That’s right, it’s corn maze season.

Last year marked my first, as my daughter and I frequented Scamman Farm in Stratham. The nice thing about Scamman is that they have two mazes: one for kids (or adults who get freaked), and…the other one. There were no requests for…the other one last year. But now that my daughter is a big girl who’s twice kicked my butt racing through the Polar Caves, I worry that this is the year we finally enter...the other corn maze.

In preparation for getting lost with (or left behind by) my child, I visited the website so I knew what to do. But in case you’re stuck right now and need some quick tips, here are some…


Do: Yell for staffers outside the corn maze to help.
Don’t: Whisper, “If you build it, they will come.”

Do: Check your phone battery.
Don’t: Say, “Where the hell are all the power outlets in this cornfield??”

Do: Stop and assess the situation.
Don’t: Stop Believin’.

Do: Ask others for directions.
Don’t: Be surprised when a scarecrow tells you some people go both ways.

Do: Come up with a solution before the sun goes down.
Don’t: Wait until that recalled candy corn you ate comes back up.

Do: Make use of your phone’s GPS.
Don’t: Give in to your IBS.

Do: Leave tiny pieces of candy along the trail to help retrace your steps.
Don’t: Leave Reese’s Pieces – they attract aliens.

Do: Call 911 if it is an emergency.
Don’t: Enter a corn maze if you think you’ll need to call 911!!!

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