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Conan O’Brien + President Obama’s Best Jokes from the White House Correspondents’ Dinner [VIDEOS]

Saturday night (April 27) was the annual White House Correspondents’ Dinner, which hosted many important faces in the political sphere, as well as celebrities … and the cast of ‘Duck Dynasty.’ (No, we’re not sure how that happened either.)

This year, the star-studded event was headlined by Conan O’Brien, who had the distinction of leading the event once before in 1995 for President Bill Clinton. And of course President Barack Obama tried out his own hand at stand-up, too.

Conan took aim at Vice-President Joe Biden, CNN and even the Hilton Hotel (where the event took place). You can see his entire speech above and our favorite jokes below.

  • “As you know, the president is hard at working creating jobs. Since he was first elected the number of popes has doubled and the number of ‘Tonight Show’ hosts has tripled.”
  • “I’d like to congratulate President George W. Bush on this week’s dedication of his presidential library … The library has millions of books, articles and documents, and if you go you can be the first to read them.”
  • “I have a question, and I think some of you also have this question. It’s been several months since you were reelected, sir, so I’m curious, why are you still sending everyone five emails a day asking for more money? You won. Do you have a gambling problem we don’t know about?”

After taking the podium to DJ Khaled’s ‘All I Do Is Win,’ Obama brought the chuckles with his own jokes, which included a slide show of his possible new hair-dos in the style of wife Michelle Obama and a Steven Spielberg spoof of ‘Lincoln’ entitled ‘Obama’ (featuring Obama playing Daniel Day-Lewis playing Obama).

You can find his top jokes and his entire speech below, which includes a kitten with laser beam eyes (no joke) and ends with a reminder of humanity in times of crisis.

  • “These days I look in the mirror and I have to admit, I’m not the strapping young Muslim-socialist that I used to be.”
  • “Some things are beyond my control. For example this whole controversy about Jay-Z going to Cuba. It’s unbelievable. I’ve got 99 problems and now Jay-Z is one of them.”
  • “The problem is that the media landscape is changing so rapidly you can’t keep up with it. I mean I remember when ‘buzzfeed’ was just something I did in college around 2 a.m.”
  • “Did you know that Sheldon Adelson spent $100 million of his own money on negative ads? You’ve got to really dislike me to spend that kind of money. I mean that’s Oprah money. You could buy an island and call it ‘Nobama’ for that kind of money.”
  • “Republicans fell in love with [the budget sequester], and now they can’t stop talking about how much they hate it. It’s like we’re trapped in a Taylor Swift album.”

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